Thank You world!

This is a post I'm making to break out into the world. The world which is so full of hope and tragedies, the world I once refused to live in, and face all alone, but I am now in the next phase of life where I'm choosing to stay in this world where I thought is completely impossible to live in. I'm taking this journey with a big heart and all smiles, making everybody feel as if it's too darn easy to fully engage in. To follow up on my scariest adventure, I've ventured out into the big city. The big city and capital of the Philippines, that is. I've finally made it alive! wooohooo! So glad I've come to terms with speaking to strangers and not let it be uncomfortable. Of course, I am exposing bit by bit myself to people, but I need to choose what or who I 'm speaking to. I just don't look too relaxed to look like a "Manila girl." I'm here to receive information on how to start up an online business or work at home. I find it actually a lot convenient, for once. I don't have to be bothered by big bosses, have to work on my own, without limits on who or what I should type or not. :))) Free flowing, I have to be. I need to engage in the bigger world besides Pampanga. How nosy! How cool! How liberating! How nostalgic I feel away from the countryside.

under construction (a malady)

Welcome! Before I start writing down, I'd just would like to tell you that no matter how interested you are in my page and writings, it's still you who would bring the "interest" down to the bottom of my heart and keep me going with my writing. To bring you out of the rut, I must say it's been a while since I started writing something substantial and sensible (I don't even know where this all goes) 'coz I was meant to just be a poet and lyricist. Just visit Porcupine Maladies, see where my scattered brain'll take you. See? It's getting boxed up with the same notion of who you think you are that eats you up like mad! The ever shrinking notion of thinking of "you should be's" and you end up going madly insane thinking that's the end of you. Boring. That is what I want to bring out to the world. The life-sucking, energy draining attitude of sticking to just what the norm would dictate you should be doing and not going with what you and your sometimes needy, unsuccessful enemy, your heart. I mean, who doesn't go to school thinking it'll be a joyous encounter with education, learning and in the process, you'll end up being informed. The purpose and reason for going to school is to get a degree, fall head over heels with your job and go gaga over cash but is there anybody who believes in that nowadays? See, when a kid shows up in school and actually put his arse there, he is actually thinking of the rewards he'll get. The rewards when he goes to school, so he'll get daily allowance. The rewards when he reaches a high score in his math subject. The rewards when he reaches top 1 in his class. Does it even ring a bell to you that when a kid enters school, he doesn't think why he is there in the first place. Just because his parents sent him there, he goes to school. Just because it's all part of the real world to be "schooled" and to be nourished with the second family we're calling, our teachers and fellow students. When we think of going to school and getting an education, does it really mean we're getting boxed up? Is it really a trap for humans to be intelligent and proud of their abilities and soon become the next leaders of the country? Bleh. The intensity of getting there is ever thrilling, almost somehow consuming. Why? It may be that us humans were really meant to survive, be competitive and almost robotic in our approach to our jobs, our status in the community and all. The bottom line, when we choose our paths in life, it matters, of course to reach ideals. We may even be too rigid in being ideal, but are we really living up to what our Lord is trying to tell us to do? Is it just a matter of living within the norms of this world or are we just to scared to lose it all to maintain our blameless image in the eyes of God? I told you, this blog is sometimes so intense, it can rattle your bones or just simply, change the way you think about why you're living and who you're living for. Are you still alive? Or are you just living? Take the time to ponder on this article. I am bored. I'm aligned with my inner needs and I shall write. Nothing more, nothing less. Love and peace, humanity!